I have to thank the Well-Red Mage for giving me the kick in the pants I needed to post this. It’s been sitting in my notes for a while, and the timing just happened to be perfect, since it’s almost my blogaversary, and I was planning on talking about just this very thing. However, doing it a bit beforehand is fine with me.
The original post is located right here for you to peruse and try yourself, and the essential question is “What have you learned since you started blogging?”
This short answer is a lot. I’m no stranger to writing nor am I stranger to planning when I’ll be able to write. I’ve completed three novels, one of which is actually original hehe. That doesn’t occur if you don’t know how to manage your time, but blogging is a bit of a different beast. Maintaining this blog is like having a second job I’m not paid for (yet), but I’ve been saying that about writing in general for years. The blogging aspect has become a part of my daily writing task, but unlike novel crafting, blogging grants much quicker and regular interactions. So this is what I’ve learned.
- One of the main things that makes you a better writer is reading. It’s one of the reasons I want to read horror, because I want to write it. Even though I have quite a few ideas for horror stories, I’m not quite sure of the execution, and that’s where reading Lovecraft, King, Koontz, and others will come in. Blogging is no different. Follow small bloggers; follow medium bloggers; follow large bloggers. Follow new blogs, and follow established blogs. Follow bloggers who talk about what interests you or who talk about what you’d like to become interested in. Like, comment, follow, interact. This will not only help you become a better blogger, hone your craft, think up new ideas, but it will also allow you to meet, befriend, and interact with all kinds of different people. Networking is hard, and not everyone is good at doing it face to face or has the opportunity to do so, but blogging gives you that opportunity. This doesn’t mean you’re going to be offered $50k a year to blog hehe (god if only…), but it never hurts to make friends especially considering that you can follow blogs from all over the world. One of my first and oldest followers is from Germany 🙂
- In a similar vein, answer your comments and interact with other bloggers. If someone comments on your post or follows your blog, reply to their comment and check out their blog to see if it’s something that might interest you. Do those blogger tag posts (if the poster opened it up to every or if you were tagged) even if it might take you a few months if not longer to get to it (guilty as charged). I know some people see them in a similar light to email chain letters or that annoying shit Facebook does, but I disagree. Blogging those answers takes time and effort. You’re talking about yourself, which has the opportunity to become as personal as you’d like it to be.
- Post regularly and/or often. Plan out weekly posts if you don’t have time to do regular, variable content. I have my four weekly posts now not because I don’t have a shit ton of things to talk about, but because I don’t always have time to talk about them. Essays take time, effort, and energy to write, and I’m often lacking both time and energy. So do stories, and don’t let anyone tell you that editing all of this is easy either. While that’s going on, I have my three weekly State posts and Final Fantasy Friday. The State posts keep me honest with my writing, reading, and gaming, and actually do help me make progress.
- Try to keep up with your blog subs. That has proven to be the most challenging for me. You want to not only follow other bloggers, but read their blogs as well, like, and comment.
Hm, I suppose these are just general “how do be a good blogger” tips. I’ve also learned that people I don’t know or didn’t know before are way more interactive than IRL friends. I think this has to do with the fact that you blog to and are following me because of a common interest. Also Facebook is terrible with its algorithms in terms of what it will post. But even outside of this, I’ve found bloggers to be not only more analytical, but more willing to accept and interact to analysis. When I post my in depth Final Fantasy thoughts on FB, they’re often met with silence, but when I put them on here (or even Twitter since I know quite a few of you there), a lively discussion will start. Facebook is like the cafeteria, Twitter is like the noisy pub where we’ve found a quiet corner, and WordPress is like a lecture hall where open discussion is welcomed.
I’ve also learned how to take disagreement. I can’t tell you how important this is. I used to become neurotically nervous about certain things, but now I realize disagreement about preferences doesn’t mean people think what I like isn’t valuable. Again, a lot of this came from Facebook where sadly the atmosphere is often about one-upmanship or making your opinion/preferences seem more worthy than the other persons. That, honestly, immature attitude doesn’t seem to permeate this space. When I read an interesting post, I often think of emulation because it’s a good idea. I might add my own spin to it, but it’s not to make the other person look bad, and thanks to WP’s link feature, you can always lead people back to the source. If I post I like Majora’s Mask on WP, I’ll get people who agree and people who might say they weren’t fond of it for Reason A or B, but it’s not a dig at my enjoyment, but rather a discussion piece on their preferences. With Facebook? “Majora’s Mask sucks!” I feel like I’m bitching about Facebook, which is not my intention, but before I found WordPress, that’s where I went to share my ideas, and it really did make me neurotic. I never knew when/if I was going to be attacked for talking about how much I loved FFVII, so I got to the point where I just stopped posting anything about it. This is probably why I’ll apologize to people if I babble about VII too much, because, well, I had bad experiences with people being less than nice to me about it. Granted, people could just not follow my blog or not approve my comments if they’re tired of hearing about it lol.
Learning how to disagree is integral to the human experience, and I’m an open person in terms of your preferences (so long as those preferences don’t violate basic human rights obviously), and blogging has taught me how to do that and accept different opinions objectively. Since we all have different backgrounds and lived experiences, what we find enjoyable and relatable is going to vary.
Thanks again to the Well-Red Mage for presenting this question, though I still say he went back in time or sent the Timely Mage to look at my notes about it. No hard feelings though :p
The Shameful Narcissist Speaks 
Excellent thoughts! I’ve found that the community here is sometimes much more supportive than my RL, which is both sad in a way and comforting, and I think you’re right. The types of people that follow your blog, at their core, followed because they want to hear what you have to say. They are also performing the same craft, so they might be less inclined to slam you personally, since, well, their blog is open for comments, too. I don’t think anyone here is trying to create a cesspool. But when you’re an anonymous person – or if you don’t know the time and effort it takes to do something – you’re more likely to be a jerk about things, I think. For what it’s worth, I’m glad I found your blog, even if I have nothing intelligent to say about Final Fantasy! 😀
Anyway, you reminded me that my post is still sitting in my drafts, so I’ll have to work on that so it goes up this month 😉
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I think that’s what it is exactly. We’re all trying to do the same thing, and most writers want to support other writers. People who just randomly comment who don’t have blogs of their own might be more likely to leave the trollish comment, but other bloggers, while they might have critiques, are doing so for the same reason they’d accept critiques on their own blogs!
You actually say many intelligent things about Final Fantasy even if you don’t know it! Since you write about universal/ubiquitous themes in video games, it applies to FF quite often since it’s so story based! So, without knowing it, you’ve become a very dear resource for a lot of my essay writing involving my favorite subject 🙂
I’m overjoyed I found your blog, too! It really validates my love of writing essays for video games, something I really struggled with internally in terms of how valid/important it was. While I’d constantly tell myself “All narratives are worthy of discourse,” there are still a great many people who see games as a bastard medium. This is changing thankfully, but many old school critiques like Robert Ebert would turn up their noses, though granted these same people would probably not understand why feminism is so important either. Video games are in many ways our generations method for story telling, at least one of them, and it’s just as valid as reading a book or watching a movie!
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Aw 🙂 Yeah I get what you mean. Video games weren’t the most encouraged form of entertainment in my house (not that they were discouraged per se, either. After all, my parents bought us an NES and a few other systems, as well as games, when we asked!). But it definitely is a tough stigma to overcome. All that to say I’m glad you’re still writing essays about video games, because they *are* worth it!! Just like a good book or movie 😀
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I don’t have much to add really. Nice post!
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Loved this post. I agree with you about Facebook. People start attacking you for voicing your opinion on Facebook and that’s why I stopped posting my opinions on that platform long back. I am one of those guilty people who don’t comment or read posts by other bloggers these days that often due to lack of time after becoming a parent. I should fix that soon.
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I don’t know what about Facebook makes people so toxic. Like these are people I generally know and have known for a long time in real life! But strangers I’ve met on the internet are more receptive. I think there is a similar mien among most bloggers (and not just people who comment on blogs).
It’s hard to keep up with your own blog in addition to followed blogs AND comments. I have a system that sort of works, but I’m always falling behind lol.
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I try to interact with my followers by reading their blogs and responding to their comments. Sadly I can’t keep up with everyone due to time constraints. Should I spend an hour reading blogs or writing content for my own site? The eternal struggle.
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It’s such a difficult balance to maintain. I try to read/respond to comments once a day, since that usually takes no more than half an hour (usually), but checking subs can be hours long, so I try to check my email on a daily basis. I used to check the Reader, but I just don’t have time for that anymore. I get emails from the blogs I want to keep on top of, but I may try to do a once a week email thing with the rest at some point. I used to get emails for EVERY blog I’m subscribed to, but that’s like over 300. Now I mostly just keep up with the people I interact with most.
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I would really agree with, well all of it but, especially with the interacting with other bloggers to grow your own blog and learn more. Not to mention meet really interesting people and have fun conversations. *winks suggestively*
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It’s a win-win situation!
❤
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On cupcakesandmachetes note, since I’m just rebooting the ‘ol blog I find that building that initial network though engaging on other people’s posts is one of the best ways to find your audience, something I did not do previously. I am glad the WordPress community is so supportive!
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It really, really is. I started this blog back in 2009, but I didn’t really start posting regularly until 2015. Finding blogs I liked and commenting led to interactions and finding other bloggers. The WP community is so supportive!
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You have very wise blogging advice there! Happy blogaversary in advance too 🙂
The community I’ve found here is so much more supportive than people I know IRL. I find it difficult to open up to real life humans, and this blogging has been a true blessing! Don’t get me started on FarceBook either… I rarely log in there these days. Anything I would be interested in seeing usually gets buried by endless low quality memes (I love good memes though), updates on every little thing someone’s newest youngster did, many shallow thoughts, or the aftermath of someone’s stupid drunk night.
I will admit that the majority of my blog followers are bots that don’t read my stuff, but I am eternally grateful for the core group of awesome people I’ve met here 😀
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There’s something about being able to write to articulate my thoughts that just works for me. I can plan things out and not sound like an idiot like I often feel I do in person, even though I’m pretty sure I don’t. I really think it has to do with us all being in the same boat no matter what we’re blogging about. We want to get our thought/feelings out there, and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read someone’s blog post and thought, “Omg I feel EXACTLY the same way.” Some of these thoughts are so specific, too. I do often find memes that encompass it, but it’s amazing to think I’m not the only weird one with these crazy thoughts running around my head.
I don’t begrudge people their Facebook follies, but it’s so vapid and shallow. You might get lucky and find something deep every now and then, but the way it’s designed really doesn’t foster that. Even serious subjects are overtaken by trolls, and so many times it’s more about who can scream the loudest over who has a valid point, blech. Like I said, it seems like a game of one-up-manship. It’s all about who sounds the coolest *rolls eyes*
I get the spam bots, too! I try to clear out my spam comments once a week to make sure nothing legitimate gets lost in there, but I agree: the core people here are a godsend.
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The planning part is what I like the best. I get so awkward when I’m put on the spot to say something IRL, haha.
I despise the shallowness of Farcebook. To most people it seems to be a never-ending contest about showing off who has the more “perfect” life, haha. It’s probably my least favourite social media place. Twitter moves way too fast for me so I miss a lot of stuff, but the people on there are awesome.
Do you have the “Ban American Woman” spam bots in your blog? Those are much worse than the “make $500 a day from home!” crowd. Thank god for WordPress’s auto-moderator 🙂
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I hate being put on the spot and not knowing what to say. It’s one of the reasons I hate surprises. I have to know what I’m going to say in situations, plus surprises can get emotional and blah blah blah NOPE.
That’s…a lot of what it is. I’ve noticed the people that break up/divorce rarely ever show that side of themselves on FB, which I mean is fine. No one wants to air their dirty laundry, but I find I like the people who’ll talk about how they almost had a breakdown or HAD a breakdown or a bad day. They seem far more genuine. Like they did a study and people who curse tend to be more honest. My supervisor is the MOST honest person I know lol. He goes off on tirades at least once a day, because we have to deal with incompetence all the time. He was also a sergeant, so that probably contributes to it hehe.
FB is so toxic, yet I keep coming back. Like if I don’t check it every now and then I feel the pull, because once in a while, you’ll see something that’s really relevant or speaks to yo, but most of the time it’s drivel. I’ve filtered out a lot of the stuff I don’t want to see, and I seem to have perfected the art of the scroll. I also decided that people who are going to be derisive/dismissive are getting ban/block hammer swung at them so fast. I guess that’s my INFJ door slam hehe.
Oh my lord, maybe? I kind of skim through my spam to make sure no one I know is caught in the web. I see the $500 a day stuff all the time hehe. WP is really good with catching that…sometimes TOO good.
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I know I certainly curse like I’m still in the army when I’m around people I trust! That actually got me in trouble at my last job… lol.
Most places on the internet are so toxic 😦 It’s very strange (in a good way) that WordPress is so welcoming and encouraging. That #INFJDoorSlam technique is super effective against trolls.
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I laugh so hard when my supervisor goes off on his tirades. He’s a very honest, blunt person, and I usually get along with those types oddly enough. I’m super sensitive, but I’m okay with certain bluntness like when it comes to giving directions I’m okay with that.
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Blunt, honest, filthy mouthed people are my favourite people 😀
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You would adore my coworker/supervisor. We’re not exactly sure which one he is lol. He used to be a supervisor before they got rid of that title. Pretty much my job description ends with a IV and his with a V and yes, we use Roman numerals lol. Fancy that 😉
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Excellent post! 😀 Yours is one of the very first blogs I got really into, and I always enjoy our chats. ❤
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Hey nice post! I’m glad you participated by writing an entire entry on the question at hand. I expected you would 😀 and I also expected I’d learn from you as well, which of course I did. I’m good at predicting the future (ahem, Timely Mage). There’s a lot about you that I want to emulate and taking care of interacting with others is on top of that list. I see you commenting practically everywhere and you can tell that you’re at the center of this great gaming blogging community, like some kind of human left ventricle.
I remember joining Facebook when it first started. I did so as a way to flee the facade of social media that Myspace had become, and now FB is pretty much there. I’d say that the experience is flexible based on who you know and stay friends with but I pretty much only use it to keep in touch with distant family and friends so they can see the kids. It’s all the meme sharing and youtube vids that migrated there that I could do without, so I never really check my feed.
And finally, disagreements. I disagree with your assessment of disagreements, but I’ll fight for your right to freely vocalize that you disagree 😉 Haha! Just a bit of verbal gymnastics, there. Thanks for participating!
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Your site is kind of a gaming blogger hub! It’s how I found Cheap Boss Attack, The Otaku Judge, LightningEllen, I ♥ Old Games, iplayedthegame, and a slew of others. You’re kind of the open space for public discourse, and it’s hard to keep up with both interaction AND your blog posts. I’m trying to juggle it as best I can, and I’m still learning time balancing all the time.
Oddly enough I’m okay with the memes and cat pictures on FB, but I hate the one-up-man-ship that seems to pervade the site. People can’t just have opinions without someone bursting in and stating that what they like is a thousand times better *rolls eyes* I can’t lambaste it completely though. I’d never have heard about Distant Worlds (Final Fantasy concerts) without it, and it does provide a way to keep in touch with people. I’m also in a bunch of writers groups on there.
What is your opinion of the nature of disagreements? My verbal gymnastic muscles are sore :p
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Well, you’re juggling that interaction way better than me, you paragon of communique, you! I’m happy to know that I could help bring people together. That’s one of the things that remains at the heart of our blog since its origins. As for FB groups, I joined a few and then backed out. One gaming group I was in, there was some jerk who kept uploading extreme sexual content. I kept reporting him but he found his way back for some reason. I ended up leaving, then I made my own page anyway, just to spite his dirty memory. XD
As for disagreements, you and I share the same outlook. I’m don’t easily fall into the “let’s agree to disagree” category, especially if I think it can be logically shown that the other person is incorrect, but then that’s rarely the case in terms of gaming anyway unless they’ve asserted something factually incorrect. I’ve got a background in debate, so it comes naturally. Sometimes too naturally. In the context of WordPress, though, there’s never been any major disagreement I couldn’t talk my way out of. Haha! At the very least I try to make my point sound reasonable, even if it doesn’t convince the other person.
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There’s this magic bean water that gives me super powers :p
There’s always that one person who has to spoil things for everyone. My observation about FB being the cafeteria becomes more accurate every day.
I think the “let’s agree to disagree” is a bit of a cop out in some situations. If we’re talking about food preferences, sure, but if you’re trying to argue something factual, no I’m not to agree to disagree about whether or not gravity exists lol. Whether lobster is delicious, sure. I haven’t come across anything major here either, and me saying that means I”m going to be in for the biggest flame war I’ve ever seen lol *gears up*
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Haha that’ll be the day when I hear the “let’s agree to disagree” branch extended in a debate on the existence of gravity. You said the phrase “spoil things” and I was reminded of a definite vice on FB, that being having movies spoiled for me by well-meaning troll friends. Maybe half a dozen movies in the past four years have had major plot points spoiled for me, like the death of you know who in the Force Awakens.
Hey if you get involved in a flame war, you just call me. I’ll rain down like the plague and force them into a textual corner from which there is no reasonable escape… provided I’m not the one starting the argument in the first place. 😉
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I don’t understand why people get angry when you say you don’t want to see spoilers. Like it’s just common courtesy! A friend of mine was utterly ganged up on because she asked people to mark spoilers on Game of Thrones stuff on Monday because she wouldn’t get to see it until Monday night. People told her that she should just stay off Facebook and blah blah blah. It was very victim blaming for her seeing an unmarked spoiler. Um, FB is a public place that people often go to to keep in touch or whatever. They shouldn’t be barred from it because people can’t mark spoilers. It makes me grumpy.
I remember Dexter season 3 or 4 was spoiled for me…by the Dexter page! The same thing happened with Walking Dead, though I don’t watch that, I heard about how the official page spoiled a huge death.
I’ll keep that in mind! Thanks ♥
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How to be a good blogger: Be TSN 🙂
Loved this post! I have to completely agree with you on how easy it is to talk to people here. I definitely attribute it to our shared interests and an algorithm that’s sensible (unlike some other site…) Seriously, though I’m so happy to have met you through here, and talking about Final Fantasy and other games and aspects of life with you have always felt rewarding!
As an aside, I’m so happy that you talked about Facebook here though. I know I’ve ragged on Facebook before, but I really can’t stand what it’s become. I know that it’s different for everyone depending on who your friends are and what you see, but all I see is the kind of one-upsmanship that you talk about. Worse, it’s one-upsmanship with babies. I’m very happy for people and the gift of life, but babies are beautiful beings, not trophies on display. No community is perfect, but giving it a place to brag doesn’t lead to good things. I appreciate that people are more open and honest here. It’s made me feel more comfortable opening up. Long story short, I’m happy for the friends I’ve made here, and I’m especially happy to have met you! 🙂
And Happy Early Blogaversary! I’ll be here again when it happens! 🙂
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Aw I’m blushing! I try to set a good example and live up to my own standards. The instant I looked at your About page and saw that you’d had Final Fantasy incorporated into your wedding, I followed you instantly. It was something we shared, and you love long form, thorough reviews like I do, but I love how everyone has their own style and methods of doing things.
Yeah, Facebook is like an addition in some ways. You keep going back and back and every now and then something wonderful happens. Most of the time I find the “who can be coolest” contests and pointless derision. I mostly see it on the video game end, so much that I stopped things about them for a while, now that you can delete comments, I no longer care. It’s just irritating to post something about one of the Final Fantasies and get some snide comment. I’m a huge believer in promote what you love. The thing with babies is pretty disgusting. Not…babies lol, but playing that kind of game. I truly dislike the fact that people use their children as status symbols as if they’re some type of trophy just like you said. Parenting is hard work, raising a human is something that terrifies me, but I think that fear is a good thing. It means you’re considering another person’s well-being beyond your own and not just in terms of whose baby is the cutest/smartest.
I think also because Facebook is easy. A quick status, a share, doesn’t really take much time or thought, but a blog post needs to be written and edited. Keeping up with comments and posts is work. Trolls don’t generally run blogs though they might pop into them to say something cruel. A community of writers usually has the best interest of the community at heart (though this isn’t to say that snarky, mean writers don’t exist), because we all realize how much work it takes to keep doing what we do 🙂
I have to remember when it is! Hopefully WP will send me a reminder, because I’ll post something if they do.
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Helpful!
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Thank you!
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Pingback: Answering Big Questions #001 – AmbiGaming
I have definitely seen a change in you once you dove into blogging more. It’s like you’ve really found your voice, and the BEST thing is that you’re not ashamed to talk about things you like. I know so many of them purposely talked about what you liked in a very demeaning way. I used to get so mad for you. But just like you, I often can’t come up with follow up remarks, so I kept quiet.
I think blogging is almost therapeutic. I’ve been over at Livejournal for awhile, and for some reason I forgot about this blog. I’ve now decided that this blog will be almost exclusively a mental health blog. Even though all my friends over at LJ are very supportive of me on this topic, I just think it would be better to keep it here, and then i could follow people with the same issues that I have. I’m hoping it would bring me to the point where I just don’t talk about mental illness, but that this is a safe place to do so, especially since I’ve been told not too long ago that people were saying my mental illness is fake. I actually had to take almost a week to calm down after that one. I didn’t realize I had people who were supposed to be my friends telling everyone else that I’m a liar.
Anyway, thank you for this post. It was a breath of fresh air.
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It makes me happy, but it makes me sad, too that some of the best support I have has been found online with people I’ve never met in real life but who accept and don’t judge me for my obsessions, but it does make sense since the people who visit my blog and comment have similar likes, but it’s still a bit disheartening that if I post something on Facebook I’m less likely to get a response than if I tweet or throw something up here. This has really helped me express myself, and it’s also helped me realize that my points are valid to be expressed. Even though I’m not overly happy with where I am in writing (as in novel writing) at least I do still have a blog writing outlet, which is still worthwhile to keep the skills sharp. I am also still editing a fanfiction, which is novel length so it’s not like I’m not working on stories, but yeah, that’s a whole other thing.
This is the best blogging community I’ve ever seen. I never did live journal, but I did attempt blogger for a bit. I liked the set up in terms of ease, but you can do so much more with WordPress and it seems to get more traffic. Once I learned/understood the menu system (thanks YouTube tutorials), it was pretty much a breeze. I’m actually looking to upgrade the blog in June, because I wanted it to be as far removed from when we pay our Amazon Prime as possible.
I can and can’t believe someone would say that bullshit, but we’ve already talked about who we think it was, and frankly, his opinion means dick to me. It still bothers me when I hear people say things like that, and it pisses me off, because they have no fucking idea. Just because something doesn’t affect your life doesn’t mean it’s not something that could affect anothers.
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it’s very true… a few of my closest friends are from livejournal (and most of them live in England lol). they never say things to invalidate me, they always are a wonderful support system and i really trust them.
when i was updating on here before, there were quite a few people who talked to me, replied to me, and followed me. and, like i told you earlier, the most amazing blog that i was following is no longer active, which makes me sad.
as for the other thing, whoever texted me is a coward in their own right. looking back, i should have pushed to know who was saying this shit. and the fact that whoever texted me said they would give me a name every other day of who it is not. that’s just playing games with me. i don’t like games. if i get texted again, i’m going to ignore it but save the texts. i don’t have time to deal with the fact that someone is talking about me. i’ve really gotten to the point where i don’t give a shit.
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I’m going to stick by my current theory about it, but I don’t know why that person would play games, though I’m recounting something about her bridal shower that tells me not to put it past her. Anyway, saving the texts is a good idea. You never know if they’ll be useful later.
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Great post! I think the most valuable thing I’ve learned since blogging (on WordPress) is that there is such a great community here. There are so many great bloggers on here and it’s so fun to share similar interests and maybe learn a thing or two! For instance, you got me interested in Final Fantasy, namely Sephiroth 😉
I definitely agree with your last bullet point… I like to keep up with everyone who follows me! In fact, whenever someone follows me, I always follow back and make it a point to read their blog. (I’m still not done reading all of your earlier entries, lol) I figure if someone likes my blog enough to read it, I want to read theirs, too! I’ve gotten some recent followers who don’t even write about video games at all, so I think it’s pretty awesome that they want to read my random gaming thoughts.
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Yassss! Another convert *rubs hands together* I completely agree. I had no idea the blogging community was so welcoming! It’s cliquey but not? You know? Like it’s cliquey without being exclusive.
Keeping up with the blog subs is quite a task, but I want to stay in the loop and support fellow blogger’s blogs. I often fall behind, but I always catch up. I’ll tell you a little secret though…sometimes I’ll skim a post and like if I have a major backlog. Or if it’s something I haven’t played or watched so I don’t want to be spoiled.
I’m shocked at my non-gamer followers haha. Even in my book reviews I find a way to mention FFVII :p
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