Final Fantasy Friday – The Switch That Isn’t Nintendo

Final Fantasy Friday

It’s the last (Final Fantasy) Friday of the year, and whenever a new one is nigh, the trite “New Year, New You” is often thrust upon us.  I, for one, plan to remain the same awesome me, and any resolutions I have won’t be predicated upon the idea that there’s something “wrong” with my appearance that needs to change ere I be considered a worthwhile human.  While there are things I’d like to do, they fall more in the realm of “I want to be able to more kill a man with a kick to the throat if necessary” or “I think I need to be better equipped to outrun a zombie” than anything aesthetic.  BUT the hackneyed phrase has inspired this year’s final question…

Which (Final Fantasy) character would you trade lives with?


I suppose I could’ve worded this, “Who has the coolest life?” but I like invoking the “switch” (see pun in the title).

Hm.  This is another question for which I don’t have a preconceived answer, though I can safely say I wouldn’t trade lives with a single damn person in Final Fantasy VII.  That’s right out.  Final Fantasy VIII is too emo for my liking…and shit, neither FFIX nor FFX are much better for the trade off.  None of the FFs prior are much good either are they?  I haven’t finished V, but it still has all the telltale typical tragic Final Fantasy signs.  With all this in mind, I think I have my answer:

 

Sexy bunny, sky pirate with a cool accent?  Yes please.  The (much hotter) Chewie equivalent to Balthier’s Han (seriously, now that I’m more into Star Wars I’m seeing how much all of Final Fantasy is just filled with similar symbolism, geez), and (imo) the ones who should’ve been the main characters, though I suppose if we’re going to continue along the SW line, that wouldn’t be appropriate, would it?


What Final Fantasy character would you switch lives with?  It doesn’t have to be a main/playable character either.  As always if FF isn’t your thing, feel free to draw from any other video game world!

Final Fantasy Friday: Humanity Is Overrated

Final Fantasy Friday

Personally I prefer cats…or dogs…or rats…or a teakettle, but this post isn’t about my rampant and growing misanthropy, but rather…

Who is your favorite non-human/non-humanoid character?


I have to throw in the caveat of “non-humanoid,” since you sneaky Petes could easily throw in Fran as your favorite non-human character.

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Final Fantasy Friday: Fashionistas and Fancy Fellows

Final Fantasy Friday

A few days ago an article popped up in my Facebook memories, concerning the garb of a certain Final Fantasy hero and how utterly outlandish it was.  Regardless what you think of this character, it’s hard to argue with that logic, nor am I against calling out fashion faux pas wherever they might happen to fall.

Also, just to note, I’m extremely picky about my parody.  If you’re going to make fun of something, do it in a way that isn’t just bashing it.  Good parody will poke at the known ridiculous aspects of a work without vilifying its value.  I’ve seen too many parody/satire sites that miss the mark and go overboard with it.  They’re not poking fun, they’re making fun, and while it can be nuanced, there is a difference.  The linked above does the former and is quite amusing.

Anyway, the article put me in the mind of a pair of questions, the first of which I’ll post this week, and the second, which will be posted next (you will never guess what the second question is…)


Who is best dressed Final Fantasy character?

I need to think about this one for a moment, because I don’t just want automatically go with my default

*checks Pinterest and the Google*

Alright, I have a winner, but there were more runners up than I’d thought, and like so many of my posts, this became far more involved than I’d planned it to be.

Final Fantasy IV

Rosa

She has spikes on her epaulets, which are usually reserved for villains, yet it doesn’t take away from her white mage aesthetic.  The one question/uncertainty I do have concerns whether or not that’s her underwear we’re seeing…

Rydia

She looks like a fairy princess and kind of is, considering the king and queen of the Feymarch pretty much adopted her.

Final Fantasy VI

Celes

Her general’s garb is so elegant, and yes, she could still lay you to waste and not muss her outfit for the evening.

Final Fantasy VII

Sephiroth

I’m a goth myself, so my hot general running around in leather bondage gear looking like a runway model is what my dreams are made of ♥♥♥  Plus, you just can’t go wrong with black and silver.

Final Fantasy VIII

Squall

A leather jacket lined in wolf’s (?) fur is never going to go out of style (so long as the fur is faux in real life).

Seifer

The long coat with the Templar crosses is some fashionable foreshadowing to his romantic dream of becoming the Sorceress’s Knight.

Final Fantasy IX

Beatrix

Everyone’s outfit in FFIX is pretty freaking ridiculous.  Zidane is wearing cuffs with no sleeves, Kuja is rocking a thong, I don’t know what the fuck Eiko is wearing, and we’re not even going to talk about Quina, but Beatrix once again shows that generals know how to dress.

Final Fantasy X

Lulu

Belts for a skirt in a fur lined dress paired with pale skin, that hair, purple lips, and the attitude make for one bad ass combination.

Yuna

Her outfit is almost the polar opposite of Lulu’s: modest where the mage is revealing, youthful where Lulu is mature.

Final Fantasy XII

Balthier

The most Han Solo character of the Final Fantasy universe, he’s kicking ass and taking names with that vest (the story should’ve focused on him and Fran, speaking of…)

Fran

Fran pretty much allowed us to see bunnies as sexy, though I suppose arguably Playboy did that already.  Fran did it better, and more literally.  Have  you fucking seen her shoes??

And the winner is…

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Final Fantasy Friday: The Best and the Worst

A Final Fantasy (et al) post to welcome you to the glory of Friday (if you don’t have weekends off then may this hopefully brighten the midst of your work week) with more located here!

Is this a bonus round?  Or do I just feel like leveling up?  This is a two part and multifaceted question and one that’s going to require a bit of thought on my part (as I hope it does on yours).

Who is your favorite and least favorite character in each of the games you’ve played?


Well, I’ve played IV, VI, VII, VIII, IX, X, and XII, so I’ll try to answer seven two part questions (really?  I’ve played 7 Final Fantasies?  Of course I have…well okay, if I only count the numbered ones).

Final Fantasy IV

My favorite character is Cecil, because he’s just an all around decent guy.  He’s willing to defy authority (the King of Baron) in order to protect the weak and innocent.  He’s forgiving.  He’s a loyal and true knight even before he became a paladin, and he’d never side with his alien half to go against the Blue Planet (sigh…).  Also he looks like this:

It’s hard to argue with such a beautiful face

My least favorite character in IV is without a doubt Edward.  Oh…my…god, he is so freaking useless (except for that one time in the Dark Elf’s cave).  He…edges out Edge in the annoying contest because at least the ninja prince is a decent fighter, but I can’t stand his overly cocky attitude.

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