Move across the country and hope the Sadness won’t find you…” I literally laughed aloud at this, because yeah there’s no fucking way. You can’t hide from the sadness.   It’s why this line I wrote resonates with me years later.  “The past will never leave us…it sleeps beneath our skins.”  This is literally the theme of nearly every story I get into.  It’s a major one in True Detective Season 4.

“…a person who gets to know not just the you you sometimes show, but the you you truly are; a person who–when you weren’t looking–slipped a naked, wounded heart into the pocket of your jacket with a bow a note that said, “handle with care.” “…not just the you you sometimes show, but the you you truly are…”  Way to drag me to hell.

“…this Sadness, the Sadness, has never strayed from your side, not really, and why would you want it to now, this epitome of stability in an inconsistent world?”  This one stripped me raw.  It reminds me of this poem, and if you don’t feel like clicking the link, this is the part I always remember (CW: Suicide):

“I think a lot about killing myself, not like a point on a map, but rather like a glowing exit sign at a show that’s never been quite bad enough to make me want to leave. See, when I’m up I don’t kill myself because holy shit, there’s so much left to do. And when I’m down, I don’t kill myself because then the sadness would be over and the sadness is the old paint under the new. I’d still be me without it, but I’d be so boring.” -Neil Hilborn

This is all from one three page short story.  I read another one in the time between posts, but I don’t have the wherewithal to talk about it tonight.  I’m definitely reviewing this though.